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About Deviant Member Synesthi19/Female/United States Group :iconspreading-awareness: Spreading-Awareness
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Poetry Book Scribble Icon OFFICIAL by DrippingWords

First off, this is my first critique, so the use of the stars was somewhat arbitrary. I'll try to be more specific in the body. Vision:...

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My newest piece (But there will be screaming) refers to the reason that I've been gone lately. 

If you have questions/would like to talk, please message me.

It's going to be okay.

It's...

okay...

It's going to be okay...


~Synesthi

Activity


My newest piece (But there will be screaming) refers to the reason that I've been gone lately. 

If you have questions/would like to talk, please message me.

It's going to be okay.

It's...

okay...

It's going to be okay...


~Synesthi
There’s a man over there with
a police-man hat and a
white lab coat and he is
neither of those
things.

He crawls inside the phone
and sneaks towards my ear.
A woman with a surgical mask
but no license is holding
a zipper.

The empty room swims.
Hold my breath and be
still.

We play with a deck
of cards.

The zipper is in a pocket
that is in the other room, but
I can hear the whispers.
The phone is a snake
and waits for me.

We need a signature.
Hey,
hey,
we need a-
you okay?


I’m fi-
I’m…
I’m f-


~~~

They take photos of my
jeans and say
it’ll just be a second.

My head throbs and
my eye bruises.

~~~

NO.

NO.

NO.


~~~

I want to get the dirt
off but we’re not
finished yet.

I want to go
home.

Can you tell us more
about what he
looked like?


Head on the pavement,
head snaps back,
hands at the zipper

No! NO! NO!


~~~

It’s heart and then
club and then
diamond and then
spade.

Heart and then…
heart and..
heart…

(God,
please.)


~~~

Officers are on the way
is there anyone with
you please stay near
the call light.


~~~

Heart and then
club…
club…
diamond and then…

Have to talk to the
phone but I

I want to go home

No.
Talk to the man
on the phone.


~~~

You need to be
quiet,
don’t tell anyone,
they’ll worry.

Unstable?
Go to the ER?
Keep quiet.
Not worth worry.

Promise?
Promise and you can
go home.


~~~

Heart and then…
and then…

You can go clean up.

Please.

I want to go home.


~~~

The woman at the table
presses the zipper
to my lips
and zips it close.

Do you want
to go home now?

Can’t tell them.
They’ll worry.


~~~

Your pants were on
the whole
time, right?


(Hands at zipper
NO. NO.)


Yes.

~~~

Let’s go home.

(Heart and then…)

Remember,
you can't tell anyone.
(Insufficient evidence)
(needless worry).


~~~

Heart…

Zipper to my lips.

~~~

Come on, let’s go home.
But there will be screaming
It's been over a month…so why is it still yesterday?

And to those who have been concerned: It didn't happen. I got away.
Loading...
Once upon a time in a
story book with
the last page torn out….

There was a tower made of
brick and stone and
bones and
coat hangers laid sideways and
the wrong side of an eraser.

The tower was lonely and
ate them up like
fire.

That was yesterday.

Now the air is cold and
the ground is hard.

And soot, soot like ash,
ash like tears in the air.
The tower burnt in
parchment scraps and
we're on the past page.

That's tomorrow.

And I will be today,
wring its neck like
washcloths full of blood and
I hate it
it hurts me

and get kicked back
on the ground because
yesterday isn't over yet.

I'm running out of
paper, this is
my last page.

And the ink will be
fire, be blood.
You'll see it tomorrow.
But because I can,
I will burn today.
The bricks will be called down
above me like stones lifted
before a storm

and I must tie my shoelaces
to the table to keep from
standing with the
yank-tug of my legs against an
oblivion without a carpet

so says the prophet

There is rust in my elbows
and in my throat and
the voices will cry out into
the night like sadness-gone
iambic

The oval in my hand is sanity
gone wild, and if I stare
long enough it opens its eyes
and looks at me
I am as you should be
and I close my eyes
and pray

so says the prophet

The world is tip-toe
on the edge of a mistake,

I am one coin-flip from
reversal, we go spinning
back in time

and maybe it is better that way.

They all are shadows dressed up
in ripped jeans and confidence
and they will tear me up
with nails made of circles

so says the prophet

We are all tubes
and the containers on the desk
hold me,
but one day I will break

so says the prophet

so says me
I’d like to be awake
for a while today but,
that’s a little much to ask.

As I lie between sheets and
undercooked dreams
I feel the embers inside me
and try to unzip my ribs
with blunted fingernails.

I try to be as you are
when you take me by the shoulders
and tell me I’m real but

I’m still not here when I
climb over the balcony edge
in an attempt to find what has been
dropped.

As my thoughts wander and
tangle in my hair I want to say
that I am drowning
but the feel of the ground on
my bare feet is too much to say I’m
right.

But it’s not enough to say I’m
wrong.

I go mad most days by noon and
stick my teardrops to cinderblocks
and try to believe you when you say
I was a good idea.

Small pills slip through the hourglass
and as I wake up long after
the sun sets I want to tell you that
I’m here now
and even though we both smell
the smoke,
I want to laugh because
if I must be on fire,
let me burn.


But the pills slide down
like ships off to war they
put me asleep as I lie awake
and
as I burn down to embers without
tears enough to extinguish them
I beg this world to please, please
just let me wake up tomorrow.

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Synesthi's Profile Picture
Synesthi
United States
I am a Synesthete (the term for someone who has synesthesia) and enjoy writing (prose and poetry), long-distance running, and playing music. My username is another (less formal) term for someone with synesthesia.
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:iconcopper9lives:
copper9lives Featured By Owner Nov 7, 2014  Hobbyist General Artist
:wave: Hello, and welcome to :iconpoetryparadise:!

We're happy to have you aboard! If you have any questions, comments, or suggestions, please :note: the group and your friendly neighborhood admins will get back to you ASAP.

Currently, we're hosting a monthly contest — check it out!

:heart:
Copper
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:iconnightshade-keyblade:
nightshade-keyblade Featured By Owner May 23, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
:iconhappybirthdaysignplz:
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:iconsynesthi:
Synesthi Featured By Owner May 23, 2014
Thanks!
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:iconedges-to-everything:
Edges-to-Everything Featured By Owner May 23, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
A very Happy Birthday to you! :nod:

- Michael
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:iconsynesthi:
Synesthi Featured By Owner May 23, 2014
Thanks!
Reply
:icon91816119:
91816119 Featured By Owner May 23, 2014   Writer
Happy birthday, sweetie! Have a fantastic day, and a fantastic year. :heart:

:cake:
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:iconsynesthi:
Synesthi Featured By Owner May 23, 2014
Thanks!
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:iconhopeburnsblue:
hopeburnsblue Featured By Owner May 11, 2014  Hobbyist General Artist
Meghan, I found your lines in GITM, and now I must admit I'm not crying but I'm not *not crying ... lol. I found it so touching what you wrote about my voice, and the reiterations that I don't need my eyes to heal, or create art, or live a fulfilling life, definitely link up with your opening and closing remarks in the recording you sent me. This means a lot ... thank you so much. :iconheartglompplz:
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:iconsynesthi:
Synesthi Featured By Owner May 11, 2014
I'm glad. And you're so welcome.

:iconheartglompplz:
Reply
:iconedges-to-everything:
Edges-to-Everything Featured By Owner May 2, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
Hello! :handshake:

I'd love to get your feedback on the changes being made at Spreading-Awareness :nod: Thanks!

- Michael
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